Thursday, March 5, 2009

POLITICIANS IN DEEP PINK

It is surely time for Phillip Adams of the ABC Late Night Live show to be arrested for economic vandalism , put in chains and deported to some penal colony in New Zealand because of his call for people to show their dissatisfaction with politicians by sending them their pink knickers.

Imagine the chaos caused to the nation’s fragile economy when the Australian Royal Mail system is clogged up with knickers. Mail sorting machines will grind to a halt, postmen will be arrested for snowdropping and divorce rates will surely jump. Packages of bling bought on e-bay will go astray , causing untold heartburn to young women and unfortunates hooked on celebrity magazines. If the populace responds to the call to send their underwear , a growing practice by Hindu women in India, our Territory politicians can expect a veritable blizzard of underwear.

There could be a positive side to Adams’s outrageous call : so many panties will be sent to politicians the Chesty Bond factory may cancel its plan to move offshore and double staff numbers to cope with the demand . If this happens, The Unspeakable Adams could be pardoned, brought back to Australia, knighted and given a life supply of Bombay Bloomers, autographed by the shy and retiring wallflower,Peter Costello, whose contorted facial expressions give the strong impression he is suffering from exceedingly tight jocks, probably not pink but true blue Liberal .