ADMIRALTY
, LONDON : Rear Admirals
and investors in the
South Seas penal colony of Australia
Felix have been shocked to hear that the
convicts have revolted against
increases in the rum
, gum and castor oil ration
and overpowered the crew of the bumboat , HMS Bounty , the former
bottom of the Sydney Harbour corporate
tax dodging hulk, HMAS Wink Wink . The governor , Captain Gorblimey , a God-fearing
martinet , inflamed the colony when he ordered a
large part of the community to
be given a touch of the
cat , wielded by his rope smoking first and last
mate , bulky Bluto , whose grannie runs a noisy speak easy in Botany Bay .
The true blue First
Sea Lord of
the Admiralty says the scurvy rats
who have commandeered
HMS Bounty had thrown
Captain Gorblimey and his diminishing band of supporters into a
rowboat and told them to head
for Van Diemen’s Land where they will be gainfully
employed
chopping down forests and
shooting the locals and thylacines.
Meanwhile , there are unspeakable accounts of unseemly acts being performed in the rigging by the ruffians who have taken over the HMS Bounty .They have set sail for the Caribbean where they intend to set up a tax dodging settlement to serve the international corporations which regularly skin Australia Felix , turning it into a sick economic pussy.
