Sunday, February 22, 2015

DESPERATE PRIME MINISTER GOES FOR SYNCOPATED RHYTHM METHOD

CANBERRA :  As  part of  his promise to be  consultative and most  collegial  in  dealings with  his  disgruntled , bottom of  the ladder  team, Prime  Minister  “ Biffo” Abbott  has commissioned   the   above   Yank Ivy-League song  in  a frantic  bid  to get the Coalition  singing  the   same   looney  tune  and  performing  like  a  well  lubricated  football  side  on  tour .   

The  sheet music  cover  illustration for the inspiring  College Rhythm  shows a  surprisingly  young and vigorous  looking   PM , in a funereal black not a Ming blue tie , being  overwhelmed  by   female voters,  proving  that he  is not  a  misogynist. 

Also  included  is  the  team’s  mascot , a  Patagonium Trotting Duck , soon to be  knighted, named Sir Robert ,  and appointed  the new  Speaker of  the House of Representatives in  a major reshuffle , which will  ruffle feathers in  the Liberal  inner  circle  of  Fan  Dancers . 

Prominent government  members  figure in the light - hearted tableau in the bottom  right   corner  involving  Treasurer  Joe  Hockey in  a  football  helmet , worn to protect him from David Rowe greyhounds and members of  his own party who want to  head butt  him ,  and the  imported , overworked  treasury second  fiddle  and   ukulele  player , the   Mussels  from  Brussels, Mathias Cormann .  

Uncertainty surrounds the  identity  of the  woman with  the two  rugger buggers. One suggestion is  this  she is a hired cheer leader  to show that  the  Coalition Team  is  ever  so  popular , despite the  polls , talk  back radio, braying shock jocks  and octogenarian Twitterbug champion, Rupert  Murdoch.