Sunday, February 11, 2018

ADMIRAL HARRY HARRIS HARASSES HOPELESS HOMBRES

HAWAII: In an exclusive interview with  Little Darwin's S(h)ipping Reporter  , the  straight talking  ambassador designate to Australia , Admiral Harry Harris , said his  first task Down Under will be to order  the Townsville City Council and the Townsville Port  Authority to  immediately overcome  the  disgracefully neglect of  the   anchor  from  the  aircraft carrier  Coral Sea  which was a gift to the  city  from  America .
Situated near the Townsville ferry terminal , this is the anchor today,rust showing through  in places , tagged with the name RECKLESS . Admiral Harris  said  he has been reliably informed by naval intelligence that   Reckless was the  name  of  a 1983  song  presented by  the surf rock band, Australian  Crawl ."That is an insulting  insinuation  on  the anchor of a  proud American  warship, " he thundered . "It  should be removed immediately , and I mean pronto !"
 The  plaques associated with the  anchor , containing  details of the  gift to the city  from America  and   wartime   movements through the port ,  were  so corroded  they were  hard  to  read , he added . Whoever was responsible  for  this  situation  should  be  keelhauled or  blown  out  of   the water .

The Admiral also warned   Townsville's  neglected  Victory in the Pacific   fountain  had better be in tip top shape when he visits  the city with Prince Harry's cutout  in his kitbag . The rundown  condition of  war memorials  in  the Queen City of the North  gave him the impression  that the place  was a  shambles,  like  McHale's Navy .